These posts are simply taken from my daily prayer journal. I find that the words He speaks to me in my private prayer time are usually for others too...

Thursday, November 17, 2011

Sweet Abandon

I know... I haven't blogged in AGES... I'm going to try to do better! I felt this was noteworthy and thus, I'm back...

A couple of weeks ago I felt God whispering this to me. I wasn't in prayer. I didn't even have my journal handy. I just typed it in on the notes of my phone. I came across it today and thought I'd share. So here it is:

"There can't always be absolutes in all things, hard core evidence. That's where faith comes in. I want sweet abandon from you. Surrender to belief... you're out on a limb when you believe without seeing. That's where I want you. Anyone can believe with concrete evidence. Whether it's for salvation or for the answer to a prayer... will you blindly believe for what you can't actually see?"

In Matthew 16 the Pharisees and Sadducees came seeking a sign. He answered in verses 2-4:

"When it is evening, ye say, it will be fair weather: for the sky is red. And in the morning, it will be foul weather today: for the sky is red and lowering. O ye hypocrites, ye can discern the face fo the sky; but can ye not discern the signs of the times? A wicked and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign..."

I want to blindly believe... no sign required. I've fleeced Him many times and He has always answers with signs and wonders. But.... what if He doesn't? I want to believe no matter what! Unanswered prayers... we still believe. We're still trusting you. You always know what's best, Lord. I abandon my thoughts, my interpretations, my will to yours.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Asleep In the Light

Romans 13:11 “And that, knowing the time, that now it is high time to awake out of sleep: for now is our salvation nearer than when we believed.”

I Thessalonians 5:2-6 “For yourselves know perfectly that the day of the Lord so cometh as a thief in the night. For when they shall say, Peace and safety; then sudden destruction cometh upon them, as travail upon a woman with child; and they shall not escape. But ye, brethren, are not in darkness, that that day should overtake you as a thief. Ye are all the children of light, and the children of the day: we are not of the night, nor of darkness. Therefore let us not sleep, as [do] others; but let us watch and be sober.”

On May 24th I had a dream that shook me to my core. It was about the rapture. In the dream I looked up and could see something different in the sky, like the sky was distorted. In that instant I knew the rapture was about to take place. I started warning those around me, “This is it! The rapture is about to take place!” I closed my eyes and everything seemed to happen in slow motion. I began to lift into the air and then everything stopped. I was able to go back in time to moments before. I distinctly remember that I was with church people, people of like faith, almost as if I was supposed to remember that most of all. When I went back to the moments before it happened, I really began to fervently tell everyone again… this is it! This is it! They all looked at me like I was crazy. I could tell they were making fun of me. No one would believe that the rapture was really about to take place. It was just like the days of Noah…

The next morning in prayer I was so shaken by this dream. I just couldn’t get away from it. I felt God saying that His people, not just the world, but HIS people are asleep in the light. We live as though He isn’t coming.

Amos 6:1 “Woe to them that are at ease in Zion…”
Ease here translates rest, quiet, secure…

Amplified says, “Woe to those who are at ease in Zion and to those on the mountain of Samaria who are careless and feel secure…”

That’s the thing… we’ve become so self sufficient, so secure in our little world… we aren’t looking for the city built by God… we want to stay here, do things our way.

Ephesians 5:15 “Wherefore he saith, Awake thou that sleepest, and arise from the dead, and Christ shall give thee light.”

He IS coming back! I had shared this with our young marrieds class at church this past Sunday. I was expressing how we don't talk about the rapture enough... that we don't live with that expectancy that He could come at any moment. The very next evening we had walked to our neighbors without telling Cam. We left our phones (which we NEVER do!). He came downstairs and couldn't find us. He told me later that his heart was pounding and he was about to cry thinking he had missed the rapture. He finally went outside and saw the neighbor's light on and ran over there HOPING we would be there. You can imagine his relief! He had no idea that I had spoken on this so I thought it was pretty neat that God confirmed His word to me and reassured me that my children are aware that He is coming soon!

Friday, May 20, 2011

Sons & Daughters... Oh, the Privileges!

We all remember the story of the Prodigal. He wanted his inheritance early. He wasted it away with rioutous living and found himself at the end of his journey eating with the swine. He humbles himself and asks to come back as a hired servant. His father pulls out all the stops and has a huge celebration for the prodigal son, killing the fatted calf. This is the story we always focus on but in prayer God reminded me of the other brother. He was not so happy about this celebration. He tells the father, "Lo, these many years do I serve thee, neither transgressed I at any time thy commandment: and yet thou never gavest me a kid, that I might make merry with my friends. But as soon as this thy son was come, which hath devoured thy living with harlots, thou hast killed for him the fatted calf."

It's the typical sibling statement, NOT FAIR! I love what the father tells him:

Luke 15:31 "And he said unto him, Son, thou art ever with me, and all that I have is thine."

That sounds really familiar. We don't fully take advantage of our privileges as sons and daughters of God. We don't receive all He has for us because we don't even realize nearly all the benefits we have as His children.

Psalm 103:20 " Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits."

Psalm 68:19 "Blessed be the Lord, who daily loadeth us with benefits, even the God of our salvation."

Psalm 81:10 " they mouth wide and I will fill it."

Expectation... what are we expecting? We receive what we expect. How big are we willing to believe? Remember Matthew 13:58, "And he did not many mighty works there because of their unbelief."

Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive."

He says we must come as a child...

Luke 18:17 "Verily I say unto you, Whosoever shall not receive the kingdom of God as a little child shall in no wise enter therein."

Let's not make it harder than it is. Children don't lie awake wondering if their parents paid the light bill or bought groceries for the week. They just lay down in peace knowing that they will wake up with all their needs met. They enjoy the journey. Let's enjoy the journey. Don't sweat the details. Sure, we have to do our part, but let's lay our burdens on our Father. He can handle it. We are His children. He loves us. It's that simple. Don't forget who you are.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Words Can't Hurt Me

Have you ever had someone just lash out at you verbally? It is so hurtful, especially when it is without cause. This has happened to me more times than I care to count. I have to remind myself many times that "hurting people hurt people." More importantly, I have to remind myself to get into His Presence and let Him make all things new.

Psalm 31:20 "Thou shalt hide them in the secret of thy presence from the pride of man: thou shalt keep them secretly in a pavilion from the strife of tongues."

There in His Presence I am safe from "the strife of tongues." Nothing can harm me there. In that safe place, I am not affected by hurtful words and opinions of others. Hide me, Lord. I rest in the shadow of your Presence.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Blessed Brokeness

There are so many words I hear Him saying to me during this time of sacrifice. I don't know where to begin. So, I won't elaborate. I'll just copy from my prayer journal. You interpret however you feel just in case He may have meant it for you too.

"I know the path that you take. I will lead. Trust My guiding hand. Expect the supernatural. Live in a spirit of prayer. Bear My burdens. Let your heart be grieved for what grieves Me. Let intercession break forth. As you pray in the Spirit, strongholds are broken. I change the things you cannot change. Give it ALL to Me. Turn it all over to Me. Be hidden in Me. Seek the deeper things.

I’ve been there at every turn. I’ve felt every hurt. Never forget Me as the God who healed your wounded heart. Bring that type of brokenness before Me. I am near to the broken hearted."

Psalm 51:16-17 “For thou desirest not sacrifice; else would I give [it]: thou delightest not in burnt offering. The sacrifices of God [are] a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise.

Psalm 34:18 The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.

Friday, April 1, 2011

Casting Down Idols

Deuteronomy 5:7 "Thou shalt have none other gods before me."

We learn this verse early in our lives in Sunday School. It's an easy verse to learn, easy to comprehend. But as we get older, we seem to forget that there are lots of little "gods" in our lives that aren't necessarily statues of a false god sitting on our kitchen countertop.

During this 21 Days of Sacrifice we are pushing away from all kinds of food, media and activities in order to focus on what He is saying to us. I have felt Him asking me to cast down the idols in my life that steal away my affections.

Deuteronomy 5:9 "...for I the LORD thy God am a jealous God..."

We fill our lives with so many things that become "gods" to us. Sure, we love the Lord with all our heart (we say) but we definitely spend more time with these little "gods" than we do with him. No wonder he warned us to guard our affections.

Colossians 3:2 "Set your affection on things above, not on things on the earth."

He knew we would get caught up in this "Egypt" that we are living in... we're no different than the children of Israel who wearied Him with their constant complaining and seeking after other gods. It's easy for us to look at them and say, "how could they do that?" Have we looked in the mirror lately? We entertain ourselves on this world's pleasures. We are obsessed with being entertained. Have you heard of "American Idol"? Yep, we're sucked in. I am seriously trying to reevaluate where my time is being spent.

I have a LONG way to go...

Monday, March 28, 2011

21 Days--Hidden Treasures

Today begins our annual 21 Days of Sacrifice at our church. During this time I plan to put away all that distracts and distorts His voice. I want to hear more clearly what He is saying to me. This morning He led me to Deuteronomy 4:24 "For the LORD thy God is a consuming fire, even a jealous God.

I feel Him telling me... "I desire ALL your affections. You will get out of this journey what you're willing to give yourself to. How much are you willing to die out and give Me your time? You desire so many other things ahead of Me. I long to be your first focus. Let me form you."

If you've read my posts for any amount of time, you know that I'm kind of "quirky" about the things I feel He uses to speak to me. Well, this morning was no different. We have a certain pair of nail clippers that have been missing for some time. Everyone has complained about this. Early this morning when I got down on the floor in my office to pray... (sidenote: this is the exact same place I pray EVERY morning)... anyway, there were the clippers under the desk. They've probably been there for weeks. I picked them up and continued with my prayer time. Then, there came that gentle whisper... "I will show you hidden treasures during this fast. You will find things that were once hidden to you when you seek Me with all your heart and soul."

I'm ready, Lord. I'm listening...

Tuesday, March 22, 2011


This post is completely dedicated to my friend, Kristi. I've seen her face so many difficulties but all of it has been faced with the spirit of Joseph that recognizes that God is faithful, just and sovereign no matter where the journey finds you. She has faced physical difficulties now that are causing her extreme, constant pain and altering her lifestyle. She hasn't once complained. She lost her dad this week. Again, I listened to her find the "God moments" in his sickness and his journey to the other side. I like to imagine her singing this song.
We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family,
protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand
to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

‘Cause what if your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger
when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness,
we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know the pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home,

What if my greatest disappointments
Or the aching of this life
Is the revealing of a greater thirst this world can’t satisfy
And what if trials of this life
The rain, the storms, the hardest nights
Are your mercies in disguise

Be sure to read the story of Laura Story, who wrote this song. (
It's an amazing testimony. It really puts things into perspective in my life! I have no right to complain about anything. I pray I can see things through HIS eyes!

Thursday, March 10, 2011

I Give Myself Away

Isaiah 58:9-11
"Then shalt thou call, and the LORD shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am. If thou take away from the midst of thee the yoke, the putting forth of the finger, and speaking vanity;
And if thou draw out thy soul to the hungry, and satisfy the afflicted soul; then shall thy light rise in obscurity, and thy darkness be as the noonday:
And the LORD shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not."

This passage just grabs me. He seems to be saying that if we will remove the yoke, whatever is binding us, holding us back... if we'd stop looking at other people, judging what they're doing & NOT doing... if we would just give of ourselves to the hungry, hurting, afflicted (wounded) souls, THEN He will make the darkness in our lives as the brightness of noonday. He will guide us continually. Our resources will not end.

Let me ask you (& myself) this question: Do you have days when you feel sad, blue, somewhat depressed? In that moment, stop and ask yourself, "Am I giving of myself to someone else who is hurting? Am I trying to find ways to make someone else's journey less painful? Am I being a peacespeaker in someone else's life?" This is a definite cure to push back the dark days and let His light shine through us. If He's shining through us, there's no room for darkness for He is the light!

Another question... are you struggling financially? We all have those moments. Now I must ask, are you (am I?) giving of your resources to someone in need? I have personally found that when I am giving out of what He's given me, my resources continue to flow. Remember the widow lady in I Kings 17? God instructed Elijah to go to her for what he needed. She only had enough to fix for herself and her son.

I Kings 17:12 "And she said, As the LORD thy God liveth, I have not a cake, but an handful of meal in a barrel, and a little oil in a cruse: and, behold, I am gathering two sticks, that I may go in and dress it for me and my son, that we may eat it, and die."

Times were hard. She didn't give unto him out of her abundance. She gave out of the very resources that were sustaining her life. Because of this obedience to the man of God and her sacrifice, verse 16 tells us,

"And the barrel of meal wasted not, neither did the cruse of oil fail, according to the word of the LORD, which he spake by Elijah."

These are hard economic times and most everyone is trying to be cautious and cut back all spending. This is a great plan, but I know that when we give even a cup of water to those in need, we are doing it as unto Him (Matthew 25). Try it. Don't wait until you have extra money. Take a portion of your grocery budget and help someone out. Cook a meal for someone. It is amazing how He replenishes what you thought would be a financial loss.

This reminds me of this song... if we would give ourselves away, He could fully use us as He pleases. I give myself away so You can use me...

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Pray + Believe = Receive!

Matthew 21:22 "And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.

We all have probably quoted this verse at some time or another, but lately, it has become so real to me. The key word is "believing". Remember what the Word says in Matthew 13:58: "And he did not many mighty works there because of their unbelief."

I believe one of the reasons our prayers go unanswered so many times is because we don't truly believe He is going to do it. Of course, I have a story...

About a week or so ago on a Sunday morning, I got up early and had my morning prayer time. That particular morning I asked God to mend a friendship. I have two friends who have really had a strained relationship over the last six months or so. I had even tried to think of ways that I could help the mending process along, but God keeps reminding me to let Him work. Leave it with Him. He can do more in a few minutes than we can do with all our best time and efforts. I asked Him to let me see just even a small sign that He was working in this situation. Later that day... NOT the next day, not a week later, but THAT day my sweet husband told me he had seen them together. The next day I ran into one of them in the store and found out that things were miraculously beginning to heal. PRAYER WORKS!

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Transporter of the Treasure

Can you believe today starts the month of March? I have no idea where all the time goes, but I am going to be more diligent about posting on this blog. I have written enough stuff in my prayer journal to write several books, but I never take the time to sit down and put it here. I am making a "Spring resolution" today... I WILL do better!

Last night I had a prayer shift at our church. I love those times because you're shut away for a few hours and have lots of time to meditate. I went back through my journal and that's when I realized how much I haven't shared and how much I had forgotten of what He has been speaking to me. I will randomly start posting some of these days in no particular order. This one is from almost six months ago.

Psalm 141: 2-3 "Let my prayer be set forth before thee as incense; and the lifting up of my hands as the evening sacrifice. Set a watch, O LORD, before my mouth; keep the door of my lips."

I felt Him say to me...
You are pushing through, pushing back the forces of darkness when you pray in the Spirit. Allow Me to flow freely through you, speak through you. Be My earthen vessel. I've placed treasure inside of you. Be a transporter of the treasure. Let My fragrance flow forth from your innermost being. Be filled with My truth in your inward parts, through and through. Let the fire of My Presence burn out self. I've given you access into the most holy place. Flesh can't abide there. Push past your flesh. You decide how much anointing you allow to flow in your life by how much flesh you're willing to die to. Leave it behind with it's demands and desires. Let Me fill your desires.

The things of earth can't touch you, can't affect you in this secret place. Here I align all things in your life perfectly according to My will. Get caught away in the rapture of My Presence. Rest in the shadow of My wings. Fresh anointing, fresh oil of My anointing here...

New authority
new territories
new favor
healing for you mind, body & spirit...
I am healing you. Things gained in the Spirit are pressed for, sought after diligently. You must always press on to new dimensions in Me. Deeper depths than before... they require a greater sacrifice.

2 Corinthians 4:7 "But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, that the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us."

You MUST read this whole chapter! We don't even realize the treasure He has placed within all of us who have given our lives to Him. It is no longer you, no longer me, but...

Colossians 1:27 "...Christ in you, the hope of glory"

I know this post is lengthy, but I can't begin to tell you what it's like to go back and read this and then know what has happened in the six months since then. He has done so much! I'll tell more later...

Friday, February 11, 2011

The Language of Tears

Have you ever just stood in awe of the sweet presence of God and all you could is weep? This is how I felt this morning. There were no words. My heart was filled with such gratitude of His grace, mercy & blessings in my life that I just had to stand and weep. I remember all the times that the tears represented hurt from circumstances that caused me to break before Him. Today was different. I felt broken before Him because of my gratefulness for all the times He kept me during the deep hurts, sicknesses, disappointments, grief, fear... He understands our tears.

I was reminded of this old song:

Often we wonder why/ tears flow into our eyes,
And burden seems to be much more than we can stand,
But God is standing near/ he sees those falling tears,
Tears are a language God understands.

God sees the tears of a broken hearted soul,
He sees those tears/ and hears them when they fall,
God weeps along with man/ and takes him by the hand,
Tears are a language God understands.

When grief has left you low/ it causes tears to flow,
Things have not turned out the way that you had planned,
But God won't forget you/ his promises are true,
Tears are a language God understands

Whatever the cause for your tears today, He knows and understands.

Romans 8:26-28 from The Message "...the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along. If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter. He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans. He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God. That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good."

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

"Plan A" Faith

Hebrews 13:8 "Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and today and for ever."

He does not change. What He did for the early church and His disciples, He longs to do for those who will believe. Our unbelief stops Him from doing all that He has planned for us.

In Matthew 17: 19-20, His disciples asked why they were unable to cast the devil from the young child. He told them, "because of your unbelief." It is time for us to believe again. We need to believe for greater demonstrations of His Spirit and His power. The more we believe, the more miracles He brings. The more miracles He brings, the more our faith grows. We need to allow Him to work, to increase our faith.

Matthew 17:20 "...if ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you.

We always have "Plan B" faith, when He wants to do Plan A! "NOTHING shall be impossible unto you!" What are you believing Him for? Are you believing big enough or asking for the plan that you think He'll do? Why not say, "God, do it your way! I trust you. I take the limits off. I want ALL of your plan. Stop any prayer of mine that goes against the perfect way that you want to handle my circumstance."

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

No Compromise

Daniel 1:8 "But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king's meat, nor with the wine which he drank: therefore he requested of the prince of the eunuchs that he might not defile himself."

I had to look up this passage after hearing these whispers from Him:

"There is power in being set apart for Me. Daniel is a clear example. He purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king's delicacies. He would not compromise his commitment, his covenant with Me, to conform to his surroundings. Standing apart from the mainstream crowd comes at a great price. Make an even greater commitment to Me and watch what I will do. I honor sacrifice. Catch My vision of a dying, hurting, broken humanity. Only I hold the answer to their brokenness, hurting, and their wounds. Cry out for them. Let your intercessions bring them to Me."

In Daniel's time, their dietary laws were a big part of their covenant with God. It was a consecration, a requirement. What is He requiring of you? Are you blending in with those around you because it's easier than whatever sacrifice He's asked of you? Stand out from the crowd in your thinking, your actions, your purpose. He didn't call us to "go with the flow". We are salt and light to this world. Salt rubs against the grain. It irritates. You know it's there. (this isn't an excuse to irritate people, by the way!). Do you make a difference in the lives you come in contact with or do they hardly notice anything different about you? I pray that people are challenged and changed by having known me. I pray I can be what He wants me to be. I pray that nothing shakes my commitment and covenant with Him. Lord, let me be unwavering in all you've asked of me. Your coming is too soon for me to be compromising what you've asked me to do.